huge session.

Ye. My camera and lenses broke 2 days ago. Now I am left with 55-200 mm lenses and thats all not a single body with working matrix. So until I buy myself something new ( which is actually impossible for me in my current situation ) I must count on You and Your goodwill... meaning - to all those people that are willing to borrow me something from time to time.

Whatsmore. I was thinking about buing a motorcycle some time ago. But finally I decided on bike. Why bike not a motorcycle , still bike is totally not .... Dramatic

Because it has outer engine that runs on your own sense of freedom.

and some of the latest pictures

Sometimes its really hard to take pictures and remain happy about it.
You encounter various people who try really hard to talk you from doing it because of various reasons , people who are always unhappy about what you have done or are going to do because they actually know what you will produce tomorrow or in 2 years ..
people who are totally confused about the industry and the rules that govern it... and the fact that I am totally out of it.
Sometimes I just dont get comments like - the model is too small , or theres too much space .. for gods sake. Thats how I take pictures , thats how I see the world interesting .. I am not like some loko with magnifying glass comming closer and closer to people just to see details .. I like the whole. But I guess ( and I know you shouldnt start sentences with such words as ' but ' ) there are so many people doing amazing portraits and close-ups.. go to their gallery.. and whine them that the model needs space to be set in.
I usually got nervous when I encounter those which understand only modern digital photography and not dare to think that you actually can go further and show something differently that will not necessarily be smooth and neat and well lightened. Like the world have no shadows... no darkness and light. I just go wow.

People please. Take into consideration that there are many people , every single different , many of them taking pictures and showing them to you. Thats why its so nice here. Because you aren't made to see the same day after day...
And something I would like to add is that photography neither begins nor ends at fashion photography and whatsmore inside fashion itself there are many styles ...

and some of the latest pictures

I DESPERATELY NEED SOMEONE WHO CAN MOD DIABLO 2 FILES for 1024 RESOLUTION

myspace : [link]
portfolio : [link]

" a lot of people ask me hell stupid questions. a lot of people think that what I say on a record or what I talk about on a record is what I am actually gonna do in real life. that I believe in it "

ye ye how many times have I heard that ? freakin fantastic stories about myself and my life , my past and my future ( ! ).

Still the truth is that I don't have a single problem with perception of myself , the world and the other people. the only thing that makes me mad about them is when they xero my style and my ideas ... style especially.
Every single of my days is just perfectly the same as the previous one was and the next one will be and I am god damn happy about it.
I have my flat with two rooms and balcony to my disposition so I can just sit there and wait for the models to come.I am not in hurry about anything because I have whole life to live ... actually recently I've found out that it's not neccesserily about being great or passionate in anyway or about being succesful .. its about being.And being happy about it.

I dropped the idea about shooting fashion seriously ^^ Not because I realised I am not capable of it bacause it actually turned the other way ... Its about the fact that I like only One ( ! ) picture from this series and I associate with only this one. The rest is like not mine. I dont feel any connection to them.

I just don't think that studio photography is photography at all ... O____o
I was taught that photography is painting atmosphere with the light. how the hell can you paint any feelings with artificial light that you yourself produced , decided about its direction , shape and strenght ? but. its of course just my hobit opinion.

Anyways. Along with the srping , as usual , came strenght , inspiration and motivation. Especially motivation to be myself. And to be independent.
I needed to go far north to learn who I am and what I really love.I spent 2 years getting to know that the photography is the only thing that I can rely on and that its the perfect field for myself to develop , to pass my feelings , emotions and visions. And that this field has neither restrains nor borders. That here I can strectch forever dropping another and another skins , raising from death , shattering everything around and building on its ruins something way better and more mature.
This is the only place where I rarely fail.

But commerce destroys me. I won't shoot for money because I don;t want it to become my work like it was for some time and when I simply didin't want to take pictures , didin;t want to retouch it , didn't want to upload it on my HD , which I did only because someone waited for them.


I am just not cut for this. Another thing - competition is ok but until the time its competition and not a pointless fight in which every single argument , righteous or not , is being countered with insulting comments about things that are totally not connected with the case like personal life and so on and so foth... I was always thaught that things can be disscussed and solved but it seems that people who also think like that are hardly to find these days.

I am sitting on my sofa in the afternoon sun. On the 11th floor in a very very small city. Smelling the lemon cake I just baked and retouching my latest series I shot 50 meteres from my flat with the younger sister ( she is really amazing *__* [link] ) of my shool friend. And I am a happy man.